Well, of course, nobody grows young. But when one crosses the threshold from middle aged to just plain "old" many thoughts come to mind. For one thing there is the enormous amount of pills required to keep me alive. I take 12 prescription pills every day. They must be working. Add to that the number of pills my wife is convinced will keep me alive and kicking (fish oil, cranberry, probiotics, etc.). But truth be told, I have learned to admit that I'm alive and shuffling. I don't kick any more.
Then there are the frequent memorials and funerals for old friends. Yogi Berra says I should attend other people's funerals or else they won't attend mine. Okay, I get that, but now all my contemporaries are keeling over. I used to think that only "old people" died. How many times have you been told that so-and-so died of old age? Now that I'm an octogenarian, I've joined the croaking generation. My father in law used to say he refused to buy green bananas. It was funnier when he said it. He lived to be 100.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot, the memory fades as the years advance. Like my old friend, Dr. Joe Garrisi used to say, "I've been thinking about the hereafter more and more. Why just the other day I went into the kitchen and stopped and said, 'Now what am I here after?'" But there is an upside to this phenomenon. When we watch old recorded TV dramas we often realize that we have seen it before, but since we have forgotten who done it we can enjoy it all over again.
I've learned to say, "I didn't see it." rather than "It's not in there." This is especially true of my wife's purse (which I have nicknamed "the black hole"). When she says something can be found in her purse I have learned to say, "Can you be more specific?"
I have talked to the Lord about this, and I have pleaded for a quick and easy departure, like during my nap. Is that so much to ask? Somehow He has not gotten back to me about that. Okay that sudden stuff is hard on those left behind, but they'll get over it.
I've decided that it's my turn first. My wife, bless her sweet heart, has many ailments, but they seem to rob her of the quality of life. They are not life-threatening. Her genetic history seems to predict a long (though miserable) life span. My gene pool, on the other hand, tells me that I have been living on borrowed time for the last 30 years. I've long past the time that I was afraid I might die young.
I no longer wonder what I'm going to be when I grow up. I've already been there and done that. But I have to admit that I am so grateful to God for allowing me to preach the gospel for over 50 years. I have built no great cathedrals. I have not converted thousands of people. I was never mistaken for an authoritative theologian. Only once was I asked to be the featured speaker at a family conference. That's okay, I've had the privilege of teaching and preaching the word of God for 65 years in the local church. I pray there have been many more saved and helped by my ministry than I know anything about. But as poorly as I have accomplished my calling, it has been a blessing to me, and by God's grace to a few others too.
